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Platypus Rex

Poll: Is Varys a Woman?

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Varys is a boy, I feel since losing his testicles so early he didn't have a chance to properly go through puberty.

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On ‎2‎/‎28‎/‎2019 at 11:07 AM, Paltogue said:

Varys as Lollys?! LOL! No, by the way.

"'My Lord.'  A woman sidled into the light; plump, soft, matronly, with a round pink moon of a face and heavy dark curls.  Tyrion recoiled.  'Is something amiss,' she asked.

Varys, he realized with annoyance.  'For one horrid moment, I thought you had brought me Lollys instead of Shae …'"

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On 3/1/2019 at 6:20 PM, Platypus Rex said:

No.  Shall I put you down as a "no"?

Yeah, that would certainly be a no.

6 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

I've been trying to post this reply for two days, clearly there is a conspiracy to bury the thread

Thank you so much!  You get five Eva Green's.  And LOL.  It must be those dastardly Phil Lesh fans.

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5 hours ago, Platypus Rex said:

Thank you, White Ravens, and sorry for missing it the first time.  You've voted in most of my threads so far, and I do appreciate it.  I have an ambition to some day find an unpopular theory that you will actually support.  Any suggestions?

 

I'm okay with simply voting up or down on your polls which are based on crackpot and/or unpopular theories.  I don't generate a whole lot of theories myself because I am content to wait and see how GRRM presents new information in the upcoming books. 

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On ‎3‎/‎3‎/‎2019 at 12:10 AM, White Ravens said:

I'm okay with simply voting up or down on your polls which are based on crackpot and/or unpopular theories.  I don't generate a whole lot of theories myself because I am content to wait and see how GRRM presents new information in the upcoming books. 

Sure.  There's no need for anyone to go out on a limb.  But of course there's no penalty for being wrong, either.  You don't even have to cut off your nose.

I'm considering polling "Bolt-On" at some point.  Surely, you'll support that!

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12 hours ago, Platypus Rex said:

Sure.  There's no need for anyone to go out on a limb.  But of course there's no penalty for being wrong, either.  You don't even have to cut off your nose.

I'm considering polling "Bolt-On" at some point.  Surely, you'll support that!

I guess there is only one way to find out.   :D

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I believe him an eunuch. I believe him a Blackfyre child. Sold into slavery with his sister after Maelys' defeat. He became an unsullied and was bought by Illrio. His mummer story and childhood friendship with the cheese monger is fake.

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On 3/10/2019 at 9:47 AM, BalerionTheCat said:

I believe him an eunuch. I believe him a Blackfyre child. Sold into slavery with his sister after Maelys' defeat. He became an unsullied and was bought by Illrio. His mummer story and childhood friendship with the cheese monger is fake.


I don't recall any clues to him being a Blackfyre child or him being raised Unsullied but we do know that, like Varys, the Unsullied all receive a "root and stem" castration so it is possible that his story of being castrated by a sorcerer is a fabrication and he really does have that warrior background.  Unsullied who work as household guards are known to succumb to the only vice left to them which is food and often grow fat.  If Varys was once an Unsullied maybe he has a name in his past like Cockroach or Rat Tail.

 

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3 hours ago, White Ravens said:

I don't recall any clues to him being a Blackfyre child or him being raised Unsullied but we do know that, like Varys, the Unsullied all receive a "root and stem" castration so it is possible that his story of being castrated by a sorcerer is a fabrication and he really does have that warrior background.  Unsullied who work as household guards are known to succumb to the only vice left to them which is food and often grow fat.  If Varys was once an Unsullied maybe he has a name in his past like Cockroach or Rat Tail.

If Varys wanted to help the poors and the Targaryens, he would have helped Rhaegar depose his father. If he had Rhaegar's son in keeping, he would not have tried to unlash Dothrakis and as mad as his father Viserys. Illrio doesn't seem to run a charity institution either. These two seem particularly set to reign on Westeros, thru their fake Aegon.

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OMG no. This is so weird! I guess that is my vote. 

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Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, Plain, Simple Tailor said:

No. What would this do for the story beyond provide a twist? 

I tend to "no", but wouldn't it be more fun to turn out wrong and have Varys luring all Margaerys, Myrcellas or Ariannes into a marriage race against each other just to marry Aegon himself at the end?

Edited by Haus Berlin

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2 minutes ago, Haus Berlin said:

I tend to "no", but wouldn't it be more fun to turn out wrong and have Varys luring all Margaerys, Myrcellas or Ariannes into a marriage race against each other just to marry him himself in the end?

:D

The ultimate endgame of Varys. Oh, this is great. 

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6 hours ago, Sea Dragon said:

OMG no. This is so weird! I guess that is my vote. 

Thank you.

I don't want to weird you out too much, but there's this other theory running around that the boy Arry is actually a girl.

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On 3/12/2019 at 11:12 PM, Platypus Rex said:

Thank you.

I don't want to weird you out too much, but there's this other theory running around that the boy Arry is actually a girl.

You mean there is a textually established incident of a young girl temporarily adopting the disguise of a young boy among complete strangers, one of whom (Gendry) still manages to see through her ruse after a few weeks.

It's not as if Varys would have to maintain his disguise for decades under intense scrutiny at the heart of Government where one false slip would be all a rival like LF needed to get rid of him or one jolly jape by Aerys or Robert at his expense would have a rather awkward denouement.

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2 hours ago, the trees have eyes said:

You mean there is a textually established incident of a young girl temporarily adopting the disguise of a young boy among complete strangers, one of whom (Gendry) still manages to see through her ruse after a few weeks.

It's not as if Varys would have to maintain his disguise for decades under intense scrutiny at the heart of Government where one false slip would be all a rival like LF needed to get rid of him or one jolly jape by Aerys or Robert at his expense would have a rather awkward denouement.

I was only making a little joke, not a serious argument.  But I guess you're trying to tell me you're in the "no" camp.    If so, then thank you for your vote.

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