Roberts love of Lyanna, how real was it?

[corbon]

I wonder what his reaction would be if he ever found out that she ran away and eloped with her own will

He already knows. He tells Ned that Rhaegar has her now while he has Cersei.
He just won't actually admit it to himself.

Ok I get the whoring around everyone did it, but you would think his pride would have took him to find her after KL fell.  

That assumes he had a clue where to look.
Ned's choice of a very small number of very close companions suggests he realised in advance that it might be necessary to keep Robert unaware.

[The Wolves]

Well apparently one of the reasons Renly and Loras thought they could succeed in getting Margaery to seduce Robert and replace Cersei as the queen was the fact that she looks a lot like Lyanna. I just thought that if they knew how much Robert was still butt hurt about not being with his one true love, then surely there must have been mistresses that resembled Lyanna in some way, shape or form.

Margaery does not look like Lyanna so that wasn't going to work. 

 

[Kaibaman]

Margaery does not look like Lyanna so that wasn't going to work. 

 

In AGOT Renly shows Ned a locket of Margaery and asks him whether she looks like Lyanna, which Ned dismisses. But we later find out that Renly has been telling Robert a lot about Margaery which seems to be the Tyrell plot to replace Cersei with her. 

[HexMachina]

In AGOT Renly shows Ned a locket of Margaery and asks him whether she looks like Lyanna, which Ned dismisses. But we later find out that Renly has been telling Robert a lot about Margaery which seems to be the Tyrell plot to replace Cersei with her. 

yeah, but that doesn't mean Margaery actually does look like Lyanna. It's just Renly and the Tyrell's doing what they can to sell a Robert-Margaery match however they can. I'm more inclined to take Ned's word (who actually grew up with his sister) over that of Renly and Loras (who are young enough that they likely never met Lyanna)

[Nyrhex]

Robert's love for Lyanna was as real as Lyanna's love for Rhaegar. Rhaegar's "love" for Lyanna was a bit more fucked up than that though.

[Mandzipop]

I doubt that Robert would have changed had Lyanna had lived. He probably would have treat her exactly the same way he treat Cersai. So a living Lyanna is not a woman he ever has loved. I don't think he has ever loved a living woman.

A dead Lyanna is totally different. Her disappearance with Rhaegar changed things. It gave him a valid excuse to execute any plans, or basically do whatever the hell he wanted. The kidnapped Lyanna gave him the 7 Kingdoms. Basically she gave him a good reason to war and whore. Since then he has built up and idealistic picture of his ultimate fantasy woman and merged her with Lyanna. He hardly even knew her. The real Lyanna would never have matched up to his ideals.

[John Doe]

The one question I have always wondered was about Roberts love. If he was so in love with Lyanna why did he not go to Dorne after her with Ned?

He was wounded.

Ned thinks Robert loved Lyanna, and he knows more about the characters and their relationship than we readers do. His hate for Targaryens is a testament of this as well. So the evidence we have points to: He did indeed love her.

[redtree]

He was wounded.

Ned thinks Robert loved Lyanna, and he knows more about the characters and their relationship than we readers do. His hate for Targaryens is a testament of this as well. So the evidence we have points to: He did indeed love her.

Ned thought Robert loved Lyanna, in the end he said that Robert had never really known the real her, just the exterior. I'm confused why Ned supported his only sister to marry a guy like that, probably because he's the lord of stormland

[John Doe]

I'm confused why Ned supported his only sister to marry a guy like that, probably because he's the lord of stormland

Among other reasons, he was his best friend. Whoring around is not an uncommon thing for young lords to do.

[HexMachina]

Ned thought Robert loved Lyanna, in the end he said that Robert had never really known the real her, just the exterior. I'm confused why Ned supported his only sister to marry a guy like that, probably because he's the lord of stormland

Same reason he agreed to marry his daughter to the man's son, even after the Direwolf incident and Robert telling him that Joffrey was a monster

[kimim]

Robert tells Ned that he "never felt so alive" as when he was fighting for the crown.  So the best time of his life is when he thought the woman he supposedly loved was getting continually raped.  

Dunno about you, but I can't imagine someone who's truly in love feeling great while [they think] the object of their affections is getting raped.  

This. No, he was not in love with her. He was in love with the idea of being in love with her, as it added an oomph to his warmaking, which was his true love. In his favor, other than his supposed love for Lyanna, Robert is self aware. He knows he's a lousy king, and he says somewhere that he should have been a sellsword. He's totally right about both.

[redtree]

Same reason he agreed to marry his daughter to the man's son, even after the Direwolf incident and Robert telling him that Joffrey was a monster

Status and glitz then, that's terrible. I know that it's how it worked back then but it's still terrible. Shed me a new light about the other side of Ned Stark.

Kudos to Olenna and Garlan to get rid of Joffrey, they care about Margaery 

[HexMachina]

Status and glitz then, that's terrible. I know that it's how it worked back then but it's still terrible. Shed me a new light about the other side of Ned Stark.

Kudos to Olenna and Garlan to get rid of Joffrey, they care about Margaery 

Not status I don't think. Ned seems genuine about not wanting more power/wanting to stay out of the KL cesspit. But I would say he is too forgiving/willing to overlook things where Robert is concerned (though we see this change throughout the novel, culminating in his refusal to agree to Dany's assassination)

[FuzzyJAM]

Not status I don't think. Ned seems genuine about not wanting more power/wanting to stay out of the KL cesspit. But I would say he is too forgiving/willing to overlook things where Robert is concerned (though we see this change throughout the novel, culminating in his refusal to agree to Dany's assassination)

Yeah, it's worth noting that Ned mostly knows Robert through their childhoods together.  Ned's opinion of Robert when he was younger was one of admiration because Robert has a lot of the traditional "masculine virtues" and no doubt he was fun to be around for friends.  Such judgements by young people are pretty forgiveable.  But in relating to him mature adult to. . .immature adult, it's clear that Ned finds Robert a major disappointment.  But still, Ned has affection because Robert was his best friend as a child, and it seems like Ned never really got close to any other man afterwards - possibly because, with ascension to lordship, he was responsible for everyone he met (until moving down to KL).  Who else is he truly close to?  Cat and maybe his children?  He has no male friends, and so of course he's going to find it hard to deal with his one male friend being pretty awful.

The idea of betrothing Sansa to Joffrey seems fine when it occurs.  It's messed up that he kept the betrothal going after the Mycah incident, but I suppose he was swamped with problems and hoped Joffrey might change in time.  If things had continued as they were, I would hope he'd have called it off.  

 

[Sarah Seastar]

Not status I don't think. Ned seems genuine about not wanting more power/wanting to stay out of the KL cesspit. But I would say he is too forgiving/willing to overlook things where Robert is concerned (though we see this change throughout the novel, culminating in his refusal to agree to Dany's assassination)

I agree he does overlook Robert's flaws but he agrees to marry Sansa to Joff because Robert is the king and his friend, same reason he agrees to be the hand though he clearly does not want the duty.  Ned will follow the rules even if he doesn't agree with them because of his honor. This is the same reason he cant not support Lyanna and Robert's marriage because that's what was decided and he doesn't like to stir things up.  I think that's why he tells Lyanna that Robert will be a good match for her because he loves Robert and he also knows there's nothing he can do about it.  As for the OP I think Robert loved the idea of Lyanna for multiple reasons but you don't really know someone until you live with them right? I think he's one of those guys that wants what he thinks he is entitled to even if he doesn't actually want it.

[SilentDystopia]

It wasn't real at all and I love Robert but even I know that it wasn't real. Like another Poster has said his love is as real as Lyanna's love for the Crown prince (I'm still praying TimJames is right and she was kidnapped) 

Also to note I feel Ned wanted Robert to marry Lyanna for the same reason Robert wanted to marry Lyanna, a means to an end for them to be "true" brothers. Also Robert wasn't a bad person, he whored and drink like another other common male person in Westeros. Everything about Robert's person went to shit after the war. 

[FuzzyJAM]

It wasn't real at all and I love Robert but even I know that it wasn't real. Like another Poster has said his love is as real as Lyanna's love for the Crown prince (I'm still praying TimJames is right and she was kidnapped) 

Also to note I feel Ned wanted Robert to marry Lyanna for the same reason Robert wanted to marry Lyanna, a means to an end for them to be "true" brothers. Also Robert wasn't a bad person, he whored and drink like another other common male person in Westeros. Everything about Robert's person went to shit after the war. 

Robert doesn't seem to have changed all that much after the war.  He was concerned with sleeping with prostitutes and proving himself in fighting before the war and he continued to be concerned with sleeping with prostitutes and proving himself in fighting after the war.  The only difference was that his failings came to the fore while most of his strengths became irrelevant (except for the Greyjoy Rebellion).  

Basically, his qualities and inclinations were very useful in winning a throne and not very suited to actually ruling from it.  It wasn't that Robert changed, it was that his environment did, and so his failings became relevant.  Robert was physically strong and able, a generous man, but he didn't have the genuine strength of character required to rule well and justly.  It wasn't that he lost something, it was that he never had it, and never developed it.  

[UnViserion]

I think he thought he loved her, but love can be such a relative thing. E was obviously deeply affected by her disappearance and death.

If we're going to accept that Rhaegar loved her enough after 2-3 encounters to abandon his family and forsake his duties, it's hardly a stretch to believe Robert loved her.

[JonCon's Red Beard]

He was wounded.

Ned thinks Robert loved Lyanna, and he knows more about the characters and their relationship than we readers do. His hate for Targaryens is a testament of this as well. So the evidence we have points to: He did indeed love her.

Actually, Ned points out twice that Robert never knew Lyanna. He's very aware that Robert's love for his sister was based on idealization.

And the fact Robert hated the Targaryens meant little. That hate can also be based on pride.

[JonCon's Red Beard]

I'm confused why Ned supported his only sister to marry a guy like that, probably because he's the lord of stormland

Ned is a pushover. When he's remembering his time together at the Vale, he remembers Robert practically dragging him to see baby Mya. Maybe is because Robert was something he wanted to be? He later toughened up, but in what respect of Robert, he was always blind by the image of his youth.