NFL Conference Championships: where the presumed MVP is the least accomplished QB

[Mr. Chatywin et al.]

3 Things:

1. It's nice to see that @Pony Queen Jace isn't dead.

2. I won Pickem!!! Anyone who says otherwise is using fake news and alternative facts!!!!

3. Ladies and Gentlemen, can we get back to that actual issue?!?!?!?

@Joe Pesci, have you seen the Basketcase movies? That's probably a good starting point for guessing what a Bayless-Coulter love child would look like.

[Reny of Storms End]

36 minutes ago, Rockroi said:

third Goodell investigated and the Pats have already been docket 3 draft picks, $2 million and Brady will have to play the Superbowl with a blindfold.  

A fair and just punishment, I think we all can agree. You forgot to mention the sacrifice of the first born child though. 

[dbunting]

53 minutes ago, Rockroi said:

I hate this shit.  Fuck that guy.  

And fuck the fact that I now have to hire an attorney to clear my name.  Jesus. you walk alone, around midnight at a hotel near an airport with your hands covered in silver nitrate and suddenly you're a pariah!  

In all seriousness, this story sucks.  For starters, it turns punk-ass behavior into news, second, it increases the odds it will happen again, and third Goodell investigated and the Pats have already been docket 3 draft picks, $2 million and Brady will have to play the Superbowl with a blindfold.  

Well the investigation proved that the pull force of the emergency alarms were below ADA standards of 5 lbs of pull force. Therefor the gravity of the earth was strong enough to pull the handle downward. Massachusetts as a whole is docked draft picks and voting rights in the next Presidential election.

[dbunting]

33 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

3 Things:

1. It's nice to see that @Pony Queen Jace isn't dead.

2. I won Pickem!!! Anyone who says otherwise is using fake news and alternative facts!!!!

3. Ladies and Gentlemen, can we get back to that actual issue?!?!?!?

@Joe Pesci, have you seen the Basketcase movies? That's probably a good starting point for guessing what a Bayless-Coulter love child would look like.

2. Is a flat out lie!!!!! But I think maybe the Russians are to blame, maybe.

[Mr. Chatywin et al.]

15 minutes ago, dbunting said:

2. Is a flat out lie!!!!! But I think maybe the Russians are to blame, maybe.

Who has the best record?

You sir, are fake news!

[Suzanna Stormborn]

GO FALCONS!!!!!!!

RISE UP!!!!!

 

MVP MATTY ICE is going to wipe the floor with this cheater!!!!

http://www.thewrap.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/C20PITQUoAEny-V.jpg

 

 

[DanteGabriel]

11 hours ago, Jaime L said:

 Ouch, the 2014 AFC Finalist Colts are offended their getting trounced 45-7 doesn't count as an impressive performance for the Patriots. If Jim Irsay didn't have to post the GM opening on Craigslist right now, he'd come in here and yell at you. 

In a somewhat uncharacteristic move, Johnathan Kraft, Pats president and Bob Kraft's son, shoveled some dirt on Grigson:

Quote

On Kraft's weekly pregame interview on 98.5 The Sports Hub on Sunday, Kraft initially deflected a question about the Colts' firing of Grigson, before referring to the AFC Championship Game against Indianapolis that started Deflategate. Said Kraft: "That game might have been Ryan's pinnacle, I don't know."

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/18533561/new-england-patriots-president-jonathan-kraft-takes-jab-fired-indianapolis-colts-gm-ryan-grigson

Harsh, but true.

[JonSnow4President]

8 hours ago, James Arryn said:

Has the story about the Pats fan getting arrested for pulling the fire alarm causing an excavation at the Steelers hotel in the middle of Saturday night been mentioned in here?

 

edit: unconfirmed reports have he and Hoodie/Brady all exchanging texts, wherein the culprit is called the 'Fire Alarm Puller', but Patriots sources say that's actually just a reference to his liking women with red hair.

Wow, an excavation?  Were they looking for dinosaur bones or archaeological remains?  

[dbunting]

1 hour ago, Tywin et al. said:

Who has the best record?

You sir, are fake news!

Clearly the WINNER has the best record, hence the title WINNER! 

Since we know here in Merica that who has the most wins (votes) doesn't actually win anything, that the (electoral college) confidence points mean more, I win! You sir may refer to me as Pickem President until my term is up next year!

 

[Jaime L]

34 minutes ago, DanteGabriel said:

In a somewhat uncharacteristic move, Johnathan Kraft, Pats president and Bob Kraft's son, shoveled some dirt on Grigson:

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/18533561/new-england-patriots-president-jonathan-kraft-takes-jab-fired-indianapolis-colts-gm-ryan-grigson

Harsh, but true.

That's great. Dude speaks fluent Belichick which involves a sick burn punctuated with an "I don't know" to seemingly take the sting out, but really just heightens it.  

Speaking of, I think the thing I want to see most in this in this world is Belichick do a SnapFace live session where he just shares his honest thoughts on people in the league he doesn't respect and ends up just eviscerating them in his monotone style. I think Jeff Ross would be out of job. 

[DanteGabriel]

34 minutes ago, Jaime L said:

Speaking of, I think the thing I want to see most in this in this world is Belichick do a SnapFace live session where he just shares his honest thoughts on people in the league he doesn't respect and ends up just eviscerating them in his monotone style. I think Jeff Ross would be out of job. 

I... would love to see this. It's noteworthy every time Belichick deigns to talk shit. I remember he actually said, after Freddie Mitchell ran his mouth before the Super Bowl against the Eagles, that the Pats were happy whenever Mitchell was on the field.

I think there's a way to get it too. Antonio Brown's contract runs out after next season. Have him make some back-channel offer to Belichick: "I'll sign a below-market deal with you if we can hang out together for an afternoon."

While they hang out, Brown can quiz Belichick while they drive around in one of Brown's cars. "What if I sign with these guys? What do you think about this team?" And of course, Brown can broadcast the whole thing while it's happening, because Belichick is totally unfamiliar with these platforms, by his own admission. Plus it'd be a great ratings coup for Brown the businessman and his Facebook Live sponsorship.

[Reny of Storms End]

1 minute ago, DanteGabriel said:

I... would love to see this. It's noteworthy every time Belichick deigns to talk shit. I remember he actually said, after Freddie Mitchell ran his mouth before the Super Bowl against the Eagles, that the Pats were happy whenever Mitchell was on the field.

I think there's a way to get it too. Antonio Brown's contract runs out after next season. Have him make some back-channel offer to Belichick: "I'll sign a below-market deal with you if we can hang out together for an afternoon."

While they hang out, Brown can quiz Belichick while they drive around in one of Brown's cars. "What if I sign with these guys? What do you think about this team?" And of course, Brown can broadcast the whole thing while it's happening, because Belichick is totally unfamiliar with these platforms, by his own admission. Plus it'd be a great ratings coup for Brown the businessman and his Facebook Live sponsorship.

Why aren't you working for marketing at the NFL right now? This should be the new Hard Knocks. 

[White Walker Texas Ranger]

6 minutes ago, DanteGabriel said:

I... would love to see this. It's noteworthy every time Belichick deigns to talk shit. I remember he actually said, after Freddie Mitchell ran his mouth before the Super Bowl against the Eagles, that the Pats were happy whenever Mitchell was on the field.

I think there's a way to get it too. Antonio Brown's contract runs out after next season. Have him make some back-channel offer to Belichick: "I'll sign a below-market deal with you if we can hang out together for an afternoon."

While they hang out, Brown can quiz Belichick while they drive around in one of Brown's cars. "What if I sign with these guys? What do you think about this team?" And of course, Brown can broadcast the whole thing while it's happening, because Belichick is totally unfamiliar with these platforms, by his own admission. Plus it'd be a great ratings coup for Brown the businessman and his Facebook Live sponsorship.

The thing is that of course Belichick knows what facebook and snapchat are. You don't just invent "SnapFace" out of thin air. He's trolling.

[Jaime L]

9 minutes ago, DanteGabriel said:

I... would love to see this. It's noteworthy every time Belichick deigns to talk shit. I remember he actually said, after Freddie Mitchell ran his mouth before the Super Bowl against the Eagles, that the Pats were happy whenever Mitchell was on the field.

I think there's a way to get it too. Antonio Brown's contract runs out after next season. Have him make some back-channel offer to Belichick: "I'll sign a below-market deal with you if we can hang out together for an afternoon."

While they hang out, Brown can quiz Belichick while they drive around in one of Brown's cars. "What if I sign with these guys? What do you think about this team?" And of course, Brown can broadcast the whole thing while it's happening, because Belichick is totally unfamiliar with these platforms, by his own admission. Plus it'd be a great ratings coup for Brown the businessman and his Facebook Live sponsorship.

I freaking love this idea. Just two flaws: 1) What White Walker is saying - I'm 99% sure SnapFace is just Belichick's favorite recurring joke. 2) And even if not, wouldn't Belichick be more than anyone be aware if he's being videotaped? Sorry, too soon?  

But, I'm definitely not saying don't try it. If the 10% chance this works hits, we'll have ratings gold. 

[dbunting]

49 minutes ago, DanteGabriel said:

I... would love to see this. It's noteworthy every time Belichick deigns to talk shit. I remember he actually said, after Freddie Mitchell ran his mouth before the Super Bowl against the Eagles, that the Pats were happy whenever Mitchell was on the field.

I think there's a way to get it too. Antonio Brown's contract runs out after next season. Have him make some back-channel offer to Belichick: "I'll sign a below-market deal with you if we can hang out together for an afternoon."

While they hang out, Brown can quiz Belichick while they drive around in one of Brown's cars. "What if I sign with these guys? What do you think about this team?" And of course, Brown can broadcast the whole thing while it's happening, because Belichick is totally unfamiliar with these platforms, by his own admission. Plus it'd be a great ratings coup for Brown the businessman and his Facebook Live sponsorship.

Well, sources are saying Brown signed some type of six figure deal with Facebook so maybe it's HardknocksLive? Damn, now I have it's a hard knock life playing in my head!!!!!

[DanteGabriel]

41 minutes ago, White Walker Texas Ranger said:

The thing is that of course Belichick knows what facebook and snapchat are. You don't just invent "SnapFace" out of thin air. He's trolling.

 

39 minutes ago, Jaime L said:

I freaking love this idea. Just two flaws: 1) What White Walker is saying - I'm 99% sure SnapFace is just Belichick's favorite recurring joke. 2) And even if not, wouldn't Belichick be more than anyone be aware if he's being videotaped? Sorry, too soon?  

But, I'm definitely not saying don't try it. If the 10% chance this works hits, we'll have ratings gold. 

Of course Belichick knows what they are. Ernie Adams probably has the passwords for every Pats player's social media accounts. It's probably one of Belichick's kids that generates Brady's corny social media posts after games. But he has publicly proclaimed his ignorance of said platforms, so he can operate as if he actually knows nothing about them, and this is where the plan becomes a chance for him to sow some chaos. 

So let's say he signs up for this chat with AB. Talks shit about some of his rivals ("I wish I could get officials to ignore my defensive backs holding, the way Pete does."). Lays out some compliments ("Andy Reid is a misunderstood genius of clock management."). If you're a rival coach watching, do you take what he says at face value, or is there some plans-within-plans mindfuck going on?

[Jaime L]

12 minutes ago, DanteGabriel said:

 

Of course Belichick knows what they are. Ernie Adams probably has the passwords for every Pats player's social media accounts. It's probably one of Belichick's kids that generates Brady's corny social media posts after games. But he has publicly proclaimed his ignorance of said platforms, so he can operate as if he actually knows nothing about them, and this is where the plan becomes a chance for him to sow some chaos. 

So let's say he signs up for this chat with AB. Talks shit about some of his rivals ("I wish I could get officials to ignore my defensive backs holding, the way Pete does."). Lays out some compliments ("Andy Reid is a misunderstood genius of clock management."). If you're a rival coach watching, do you take what he says at face value, or is there some plans-within-plans mindfuck going on?

Genius.

Their wildly divergent opinions on Trump not withstanding, we'll make this happen someday. 

[JonSnow4President]

29 minutes ago, Jaime L said:

Genius.

Their wildly divergent opinions on Trump not withstanding, we'll make this happen someday. 

Belichick would have Putin nuking himself in 2 weeks and singlehandedly bring accountability to every government worker.  I say go for it, even if he is a Democrat. 

[Jace, Extat]

This is genius. His first press address would go

Reporter: Mr. President Belichick, do you think the size of your inaugural crowd will have an effect on the way your administration performs?

Belichick: I don't know, you'd have to ask Donald and Barry.

[Jaime L]

10 minutes ago, JonSnow4President said:

Belichick would have Putin nuking himself in 2 weeks 

We're on to North Korea. 

2 minutes ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

Reporter: Mr. President Belichick, do you think the size of your inaugural crowd will have an effect on the way your administration performs?

We're on to North Korea.