Football nº 10

[mormont]

Let's face it. We all love a ridiculous injury story.

RANGERS star Kirk Broadfoot was left nursing a sore face after an exploding EGG landed him in hospital.

The Scotland full-back was inspecting two eggs he had just poached in his microwave when one of them blew up and squirted scalding-hot water into his face.

A Rangers insider said: "It may sound funny but it was quite a serious accident. Kirk's face was quite badly burned."

It 'may' sound funny? :P

[Maltaran]

Let's face it. We all love a ridiculous injury story.

It 'may' sound funny? :P

Why did he put an egg in the microwave in the first place? I thought it was common knowledge that they exploded when you do that.

Still, it's not as good as Dave Beasant severing a tendon by dropping a bottle of salad cream on his foot.

[mormont]

As any fule kno, you can poach eggs in the microwave (and the article explains how). Broadfoot just forgot that you need to pierce the yolk first.

[Calibandar]

Man United to become English Champions today?

[Isis]

As any fule kno, you can poach eggs in the microwave (and the article explains how). Broadfoot just forgot that you need to pierce the yolk first.

I think a lot of people take microwaves for granted and think that they are completely safe no matter what you do with them. But it is quite easy to do really unsafe/dangerous things with them, like superheat liquids which then EXPLODE and burn you when you touch them.

It would be interesting to see video evidence of this incident though. :)

[Xray the Enforcer]

A hearty congratulations to Jermaine Defoe for that shady tackle...on the linesman. :lol:

(it's even funnier in replay because it's fairly obvious that he threw his foot out there to trip the other "player" up, except that the guy he took out had a flag in his hand.)

[Xray the Enforcer]

Spurs win on a dodgy penalty. I mean, go Spurs and all, but that was a poor call.

[Jon AS]

I love the last couple of games of a season: 9 games being played simultaneously and usually we also get a lot of goals. And of course there's that title race, where we are now down to three serious contenders for the final day. Of these three, Stuttgart (who are on an unbelievable run) and Bayern will face each other and at the very least they are going to be playing for direct CL qualification, if Hertha (whose title aspirations were fittingly stopped by their lack of goalscoring ability today) win they can still squeeze past either Stuttgart or Bayern (or even both, in case of a draw) so one of the three will lose out on all that nice CL money. Wolfsburg are still on top, thanks to their brilliant striking duo of Grafite and Dzeko (26 and 25 goals respectively) and can probably seal the title with a draw against Werder (who will be preoccupied with winning a cup final or two) since their goal difference is better then Bayern's by 7.

One step below the leading quartet Hamburg and Dortmund are fighting for the last UEFA Cup spot, both have 58 points with Dortmund ahead on goal difference. Hamburg really didn't deal well with the double KO delivered to them in the two semifinals by Werder, who then followed it up by winning the league game against Hamburg as well, despite it being completely meaningless from Bremen's perspective.

Hoffenheim, the story of the first half of the season, really collapsed. I think the injured Ibisevic might have been more difficult to compensate then I would have thought: after all, despite not having played a game since the winter break, he's still in 5th place in the goalscoring charts and their second best striker, Ba, only scored 3 or 4 goals during the second half of the season.

[The Iceman of the North]

Went to the match today. What was unusual was that during the announcement of the line up, one of the players on the opposite team got applause, this is particularly rare for a player that have never played for us, but what was a first for me was that the referee got applause. I guess there weren't too many Chelsea fans on the stands.

[Calibandar]

Jon,

Does Germany really have so few UEFA Cup ( or Euro League as I believe it is now called) spots? Only 2, outside of the top 3 who go to the CL?

I thought Hoffenheim, if they finish 7th, would still play UEFA Cup, but that was an assumption on my part. In any case the title race in Germany has long been very tense, right until the end, but now Wolfsburg's 5-0 victory seems to have sealed the deal. Stuttgart has been on a great run. I suppose the no. 2 will have direct qualification and the no. 3 goes to qualification right?

Anyway, I saw that in England now the first 3 teams qualify automatically for the CL. Didn't know that, which is why I saids a while ago that Liverpool might have missed out on direct qualification if they weren't careful. Obviously that was never in the cards.

Man U champions. A consistent string of victories simply didn't allow the competition to close in on them. Chelsea and Liverpool did what they could but it's been one long chase in the second half of the season, and Man U have just been more consistent than they have been. This is the 18th League title for Manchester United, so they are now level with Liverpool as record holders in England. It's also the 3rd title in a row for Man U, and the 11th championship title since Alex Ferguson became manager of the club.

Other leagues are nearly all decided as well.

The Netherlands: AZ

Germany: Wolfsburg, Bayern ( Louis van Gaal's new club) or Stuttgart.

France: Marseille or Bordeaux ( for the 1st time in years Lyon will not win, maybe Benzema will leave now)

Italy: Inter, again. Speculation that Ancelotti will be sacked by AC Milan and possibly a Dutch coach may take over.

Spain: Barca

[Jon AS]

Does Germany really have so few UEFA Cup ( or Euro League as I believe it is now called) spots? Only 2, outside of the top 3 who go to the CL?

I think they went with the name "Europa League". As if a name change is going to make the competition more prestigious. As for European starters in the league, yup that comes with not being in the top three leagues: 2 CL slots, one CL qualifying slot, 3 Europa League (I have trouble imagining this name ever catching on. But then again, Champions League did...) slots (two for the league, one for the Cup). That's one less CL spot than England, Italy and Spain and I thought they also had a team more starting in the EL (no, I'm going to go with UEFA Cup for the forseeable future), but according to Wikipedia there is a maximum of 3 UEFA Cup slots for the first six countries, while 7th and 8th get 4. I guess that means that in the future (or is it this season already?) only the fifth place in the Premier League will mean European qualification, with the third slot going to the League Cup winner.

Italy: Inter, again. Speculation that Ancelotti will be sacked by AC Milan and possibly a Dutch coach may take over.

Thos sneaky Dutch, they're everywhere! One day we're going to wake up and find out they've replaced the Illuminati as the world's shadow government. Or maybe they already have... :leaving:

[Horza]

Jon,

What are the chances of Karlsruhe dodging the bullet, if any?

[Jon AS]

What are the chances of Karlsruhe dodging the bullet, if any?

It's extremely unlikely. They need to beat Hertha (chasing CL football) at home while neither Bielefeld nor Cottbus win against Hannover (a possibility, Hannover's season is over) and Leverkusen (they've also got nothing to play for in the league, but they are a very good team). If that happens, Karlsruhe will jump to 16th, which will mean a relegation play-off against the 2nd Bundesliga's third placed team, which at this point could be one of half a dozen clubs.

[kiko]

I don't think the deal is sealed yet for Wolfsburg. Bremen is a very unpredictable opponent and I doubt they will accept another strong force in the North. But wouldn't it be ironic if VW Wolfsburg would win the championship and Bayer Leverkusen the cup?

Gladbach vs Dortmund will be interesting. Gladbach might seem saved, but Dortmund is on a roll and they would love to kick out Gladbach, so they wouldn't be content with a marginal victory.

Karlsruhe is an hopeless case. They can't score, and by all rights they should have been finished if not for Bremen's shameful behavior. Bielefeld and Cottbus are hard to predict, they both have home games versus teams that can achieve nothing anymore. A slight advantage for Cottbus, because of Leverkusen's final game.

[Jon AS]

But wouldn't it be ironic if VW Wolfsburg would win the championship and Bayer Leverkusen the cup?

In an Alanis Morissette kind of way, I guess. Btw, it's interesting how VW don't think it necessary to have their name integrated into the club name, maybe because the entire city of Wolfsburg wouldn't exist without them.

Gladbach vs Dortmund will be interesting. Gladbach might seem saved, but Dortmund is on a roll and they would love to kick out Gladbach, so they wouldn't be content with a marginal victory.

More importantly, Dortmund will want that UEFA Cup slot.

They can't score, and by all rights they should have been finished if not for Bremen's shameful behavior. Bielefeld and Cottbus are hard to predict, they both have home games versus teams that can achieve nothing anymore. A slight advantage for Cottbus, because of Leverkusen's final game.

So it's 'shameful' when done by Bremen, but perfectly acceptable when it's Leverkusen and Hannover? :P

ETA: Bielefeld have just sacked Frontzeck, one game before the end of the season. WTF?

[kiko]

I'm taking the Dortmund win for granted. And no, I don't remember at all how they like to throw away a season in their last game ;)

It wouldn't be less shameful, but its to be expected these days.

[squiddly]

Haha, Middlesbrough are so getting relegated. :P

And Fulham will manage to sneak the last UEFA qual place over Tottenham. I don't see them losing against Everton again, not at home. Probably a draw (which will bring Villa up to 5th).

[mormont]

I don't like a bad loser.

Liverpool boss Rafael Benitez refused to congratulate Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson for beating his side to the Premier League title.

"I prefer just to say well done to the club, a big club, a good club," he said after Liverpool beat West Brom 2-0.

"Normally you have to be polite and respect the other manager but during the season we have seen a lot of things that I didn't like, so that's it.

"I say congratulations to United because they have won. And that's it."

[Horza]

Honestly, premiership managers put toddlers to shame.

[mormont]

Well, if you want to talk about shame...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O15K2Ag37w

Apparently Lafferty is now very, very sorry and wants to personally apologise to the ref, the other player, his manager, and each and every one of us. Possibly helped in this remorse by the club fine and an epic bollocking from Walter Smith. :rolleyes: