Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 Point of order! Are we talking like cute little kisses or full on making out? Sorry, for the Eurocommies, "snogging." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcbigski Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 10 hours ago, 3CityApache said: Well, I met my soon to be ex-wife when we were both at college in mid-nineties, and I've never been dating since. What are the odds of meeting anyone in any way now, twenty some years later? Close to 100%. I'd say just go do your regular comfortable social things, whatever they are, and someone will cross your path. In the mean time, you'll be doing things you enjoy. Just stay relaxed about the whole thing and don't sweat it. Personally I'm not a fan of online dating so I'd recommend sticking to real life local stuff. I think everyone I've ever met in person from online dating said "wow you're really 6'5" in person" which made me think, why would I say that otherwise and what the fuck lies are do you read all the time? I'm sure by now "The Tao of Steve" is super problematic, but there's more than kernel of truth about picking your strong suit and being excellent at it. Just adjust for the fact that you're two decades older than the last time you were single when you're considering potential matches. Emotionally especially, not physically. Someone who gets your scars, and has learned from herself's too. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starkess Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 1 hour ago, mcbigski said: Close to 100%. I'd say just go do your regular comfortable social things, whatever they are, and someone will cross your path. In the mean time, you'll be doing things you enjoy. Just stay relaxed about the whole thing and don't sweat it. Personally I'm not a fan of online dating so I'd recommend sticking to real life local stuff. I think everyone I've ever met in person from online dating said "wow you're really 6'5" in person" which made me think, why would I say that otherwise and what the fuck lies are do you read all the time? I'm sure by now "The Tao of Steve" is super problematic, but there's more than kernel of truth about picking your strong suit and being excellent at it. Just adjust for the fact that you're two decades older than the last time you were single when you're considering potential matches. Emotionally especially, not physically. Someone who gets your scars, and has learned from herself's too. Good luck. 90% of guys lie about their height in their bio. It's one of those things now I think where it's so common that it's actually a big penalty for guys that *don't* lie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 15 minutes ago, Starkess said: 90% of guys lie about their height in their bio. It's one of those things now I think where it's so common that it's actually a big penalty for guys that *don't* lie. Now that's interesting. I would say I'm 5'8 because I'm just a quarter inch under. No one really said anything, other than a few short women who said I was taller than they expected. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starkess Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 30 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said: Now that's interesting. I would say I'm 5'8 because I'm just a quarter inch under. No one really said anything, other than a few short women who said I was taller than they expected. Yeah that's a totally reasonable rounding. But for example it's a common joke that never believe 5'11" because the guys who are actually 5'11" all round up to 6' but the 5'9" guys know they can't get away with that but think 5'11" is believable. I think a lot of women just commonly assume that a guy's height might be up to 2" exaggerated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 5 minutes ago, Starkess said: Yeah that's a totally reasonable rounding. But for example it's a common joke that never believe 5'11" because the guys who are actually 5'11" all round up to 6' but the 5'9" guys know they can't get away with that but think 5'11" is believable. I think a lot of women just commonly assume that a guy's height might be up to 2" exaggerated. I'm well aware. I was more interested in the part about: Quote It's one of those things now I think where it's so common that it's actually a big penalty for guys that *don't* lie. What do you mean by this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigFatCoward Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 Anyone who asked my height would be getting asked their weight. Rude as fuck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 43 minutes ago, BigFatCoward said: Anyone who asked my height would be getting asked their weight. Rude as fuck. Yes and no. I wouldn't let it bother you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigFatCoward Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 39 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said: Yes and no. I wouldn't let it bother you. Thankfully, hopefully it will never be an issue. I will do everything in my power to keep MrsBFC happy. The thought of having to date again fills me with total dread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A True Kaniggit Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 3 hours ago, Starkess said: 90% of guys lie about their height in their bio. It's one of those things now I think where it's so common that it's actually a big penalty for guys that *don't* lie. Yeah. I can believe this. I'm only 5'5. I accept that. I find it amusing when people who are obviously the same height as me claim to be taller. Edit: 5'5 = 165 cm you barbarians. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartofice Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 It's not really surprising guys tend to add an inch or two to their height on dating profiles, seeing as it seems to be the one measurable variable that many women judge men on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigFatCoward Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 I mean I'd round up rather than down, but outright lying seems pointless, who is going to see you again if you are proven a blatant liar on the first date? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartofice Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 Depends on the lie, a couple of inches between friends doesn’t mean much in reality but could be the difference between not getting a first date or response on a dating site. The incentive is to add an inch or two if you want any sort or response if you are less than 6ft Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry of the Lawn Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 7 hours ago, Starkess said: Yeah that's a totally reasonable rounding. But for example it's a common joke that never believe 5'11" because the guys who are actually 5'11" all round up to 6' but the 5'9" guys know they can't get away with that but think 5'11" is believable. I think a lot of women just commonly assume that a guy's height might be up to 2" exaggerated. Guys just seem to do this in general about height. I don't know how many dudes have told me that I must be 6'3" or so because they are 6' and I am taller than they are. I am exactly 6', so in reality they are more like 5'9". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datepalm Posted October 24, 2020 Author Share Posted October 24, 2020 I assume its because its one of those things that can actually be filtered on on many apps - so if you're under 5'5 or whatever, you assume some (high?) percentage of women are simply never seeing your profile. Why you would then still want to go about dating these women baffles me a bit, but I also sort of get it. I've seen profiles that have the height listed as X, and somewhere in the description say, "oh, actually X-2." IDEK. I've also seen a few dudes do that with age, where it usually more like X+10, X+15 which I don't even know where to start on. Like, yeah, unfortunately this terrible app makes me say I'm 45, but I'm really only interested in dating a 30 year old, and once you see my profile, you'll totally be into me, amirite, even though you're filtering out anyone my age because, oh, you are actually 30. But also let me here inform you of this complex I have about it all. Oh, AND, my meh date from a few weeks back had texted me to say btw, that he's only 5'5 and, IIRC, "not some big macho dude" ahead of meeting, and I can't even remember what it said on his actual profile or whether he'd lied about it, because its not something I actually look at. (I mean, I actually wasn't that bothered by it - I get insecurity - though I can't pretend it was much of a turn on either. I was bothered by how this extended to absolutely everything else about him.) Also my roommates all thought 5'5' was legitimately a height to be a bit anxious about, whereas I think 5'5 is like...normal? I'm 5'5 and I sort of think of any guy my height or even an inch under as basically a neutral thing. Like the text just didn't even entirely make sense to me that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartofice Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 9 minutes ago, Datepalm said: I assume its because its one of those things that can actually be filtered on on many apps - so if you're under 5'5 or whatever, you assume some (high?) percentage of women are simply never seeing your profile. Why you would then still want to go about dating these women baffles me a bit, but I also sort of get it. I've seen profiles that have the height listed as X, and somewhere in the description say, "oh, actually X-2." IDEK. I've also seen a few dudes do that with age, where it usually more like X+10, X+15 which I don't even know where to start on. Like, yeah, unfortunately this terrible app makes me say I'm 45, but I'm really only interested in dating a 30 year old, and once you see my profile, you'll totally be into me, amirite, even though you're filtering out anyone my age because, oh, you are actually 30. But also let me here inform you of this complex I have about it all. Yeah I think with many of these sites they make it so that older guys can't message younger girls, which is totally fair because most younger girls are just not going to want to be letched on by creepy old dudes. However, it does make age gaps kind of impossible at times, and age gaps aren't really always such a bad thing. If you are a young looking guy who is in good shape and doing well, but you are in your mid or late 30's then maybe you aren't really interested in the dating pool of women who are also in their mid to late 30s.. because its pretty slim pickings! Guys often are looking to settle down a bit later in life than most women and an age gap often works. My other half is almost a decade younger than me and its pretty perfect all round. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartofice Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 14 minutes ago, Chataya de Fleury said: I never paid much attention to height. Seriously. I think you’d be quite unusual in that to be honest. It’s pretty much the one consistent thing on most profiles that gets mentioned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 8 hours ago, BigFatCoward said: Thankfully, hopefully it will never be an issue. I will do everything in my power to keep MrsBFC happy. The thought of having to date again fills me with total dread. This is a funny, but reasonable, motivation to keep the flame alive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liffguard Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 1 hour ago, Datepalm said: I assume its because its one of those things that can actually be filtered on on many apps - so if you're under 5'5 or whatever, you assume some (high?) percentage of women are simply never seeing your profile. Why you would then still want to go about dating these women baffles me a bit.. This was pretty much my perspective, back when I was online dating. I never lied about my (below average) height. Initially because it never occurred to me to do so. But later because anyone who cared about a hard number in that regard is probably not someone I'd be interested in dating anyway. Nothing wrong with having preferences, but anyone with strict numerical requirements for physical appearance is not someone I particularly need in my life. Rather than opportunity missed, I considered it bullet dodged. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theda Baratheon Posted October 24, 2020 Share Posted October 24, 2020 1 hour ago, Chataya de Fleury said: I never paid much attention to height. Seriously. Same. If anything it’s quite nice when someone is around my height. I’d rather someone be honest but it’s not like I really zero in on that part of the profile much to notice if it’s a lie anyway I guess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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