Liffguard

Guess I just get to keep using this... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DT1mGoLDRbc

I definitely fully reserve the right to change my mind in the future. I'm the oldest of my siblings, and my dad was well into his forties when I was born, so I have first hand experience that being an older dad can turn out fine. But there's such a huge difference between "I want to have kids one day" and "I might want to have kids one day, but currently don't." A few years before my ex and I first got together, I actually did go on one date with her sister. It never went anywhere (and thank fuck for that because whilst she's a lovely person we would have been terrible together).

Don't worry, like I said I have no intention of doing anything about this. I just wanted to vent because now I need to stress about actively maintaining that resolve, rather than being able to put it out of my mind. Also, for what it's worth, she knows I don't want kids. Even in my fantasies I'm not proposing keeping that a secret. It's totally out in the open. I've just...never wanted them. I've never felt that itch. I do have concrete reasons as well. I value my freedom very highly. I want to have the ability to change careers on a whim, change countries on a whim. I value being able to get together with friends and fuck off to an airbnb on the beach for a long weekend at two days notice. I value being able to wake up on a sunday morning, knowing I have no demands being made of me, no responsibilities, and spend the entire day in bed with a book. On top of that, having children is the only normal life decision that most people make that is completely irreversible. Wrong career? Quit your job and find a new one. Wrong house? Sell it and move. Wrong spouse? Get a divorce. I'm not saying any of these decisions are easy or without consequence, but they can be made. But once you have a child, then barring tragedy you are absolutely 100% no-take-backs in it for the long haul. Which means to me, I need to be 100% committed to make that call. Anything less than total committment isn't enough. But if I'm being totally honest, these are after-the-fact justifications. I don't want kids. The desire just...isn't there.

I agree, there's nothing inherent to Brexit as a concept that requires it to be pursued in the manner that the Tories have pursued it. I can imagine several unobjectionable Brexit scenarios, and some I might potenially actively support. But none of them were ever realistically on the table under our current leadership. I think it's less of a betrayal, more of an inevitable consequence, but that's a different discussion for a different day.

I think this is pretty spot-on. The primary architects of Brexit haven't been particularly coy about their desire to turn post-Brexit UK into a low-regulation financial playground.

It was the third party. But, in her own words, she "wasn't actually that bothered and didn't shed any tears." Dude strung her along for months then dumped her by text message.

She wants kids. Like, really wants kids, and is dating with the explicitly stated intention of finding a long-term partner to eventually have kids with. I don't want kids, never have, and probably never will. Also, as an aside, she's mutual friends with my ex. My ex and I are still friends ourselves, and on good terms, so it's not a dealbreaker or anything, but still a complicating factor.

This is what I use at the moment. I could probably go about double that.

I mentioned in the last thread I'd caught some major feelings for someone. But since she was already in a relationship, it was easy enough to resist acting on them. I would never try to break up an already existing relationship. Readers, she is no longer in a relationship. I'm not gonna do anything. Firstly because it's still kind of skeevy to swoop in on someone within days of a break-up (even if apparently it was more of an "it's complicated" situation rather than a full-on relationship). And secondly, because like I mentioned before, we have a major, non-compromisable incompatibility. But it sucks because now it's much harder to resist that insidious little voice telling me to go for it. When she was already spoken for, it was (relatively) easy to shrug my shoulders and tell myself oh well, plenty more fish in the sea. Now I feel conflicted, even though I know rationally there's nothing there.

I appreciate the advise, but that is ever so slightly outside my budget.

I will now use this term exclusively.

I don't know if this counts as skincare or haircare (both?) but I've recently become a major beard oil convert. Mainly because it seems to help prevent the skin beneath my beard getting too dry, and subsequently helps to prevent beard dandruff. And let me say, there are few things in this world less sexy than beard dandruff. Semi-related, but I've also started occasionally wearing a little bit of cologne. Took me a while to find something that I liked that wasn't too heavy or overpowering (also, why do we have a separate name for men's perfumes? Shouldn't we still just call it perfume? Anyway, I digress...).

If I ever get married I fucking hope she has a higher salary than me, otherwise we'll probably be eating a lot of ramen. Okay, that's maybe an exaggeration, but based on my job history I highly doubt I'll ever be bringing in a high salary, or even a medium salary. If my future hypothetical wife wants to be the main breadwinner she will have my enthusiastic gratitude.

I don't see how Starmer could possibly have handled this worse. He's somehow managed to piss off everybody without actually resolving anything one way or another.

Dude, I agree with you. I'm just describing what his position is. I agree that it's incoherent and harmful.