Watch, Watched, Watching: No Dragons Allowed

[Ran]

1 hour ago, Veltigar said:

That guy really needs more work. I thought he was excellent as Ashur.

He was on The Expanse for a couple of seasons in a fairly minor role, but he brought some life to it. He plays untrustworthy very well.

[RumHam]

Watched the Jaws ripoff Orca for the first time since childhood. I saw the 9% rotten tomatoes score and thought "that seems harsh." But no, it really was that bad. 

Also I should not have seen that movie when I was like ten. 

I watched Jaws 2 after and maybe it was just by comparison but that's not a bad movie. Unessecary sure. I wonder if it would have been a a bit more interesting/better had Dryfuss come back. 

They explain his absence by saying he's on an artic research mission. I'm surprised they haven't tried to turn that mission into a Hooper spinoff. I would watch Jaws vs. The Thing.

[Mr. Chatywin et al.]

21 minutes ago, RumHam said:

Watched the Jaws ripoff Orca for the first time since childhood.

Just watched the trailer for this and damn that looks bad. What's worse, Orca or Jaws 4 The Revenge?

Quote

They explain his absence by saying he's on an artic research mission. I'm surprised they haven't tried to turn that mission into a Hooper spinoff. I would watch Jaws vs. The Thing.

This is an interesting idea, but it would probably need to be The Thing vs. Deep Blue Sea to actually work.

[RumHam]

Just now, Tywin et al. said:

Just watched the trailer for this and damn that looks bad. What's worse, Orca or Jaws 4 The Revenge?

Oof, tough call. They're both shitty movies about animals seeking vengence. I think Jaws 4 is much more watchable. Between Michael Cane and the shark roaring like a lion before exploding for no reason. 

I also always get a kick out of Ellen Brody having flashbacks to an event she wasn't present for.

But then Jaws 4 is also sorta an insult to a great movie.

[dbunting]

51 minutes ago, RumHam said:

Watched the Jaws ripoff Orca for the first time since childhood. I saw the 9% rotten tomatoes score and thought "that seems harsh." But no, it really was that bad. 

Also I should not have seen that movie when I was like ten. 

I watched Jaws 2 after and maybe it was just by comparison but that's not a bad movie. Unessecary sure. I wonder if it would have been a a bit more interesting/better had Dryfuss come back. 

They explain his absence by saying he's on an artic research mission. I'm surprised they haven't tried to turn that mission into a Hooper spinoff. I would watch Jaws vs. The Thing.

This post is funny, I just recently thought about this, I also watched as a kid and I liked it, but haven't seen it in years. Really only remember a couple things about it, feeling sad for the killer whale watching it's baby get killed and Bo Derek!

[RumHam]

8 minutes ago, dbunting said:

This post is funny, I just recently thought about this, I also watched as a kid and I liked it, but haven't seen it in years. Really only remember a couple things about it, feeling sad for the killer whale watching it's baby get killed and Bo Derek!

That whale stillbirth was messed up! Like a less funny version of this:

 

[Mr. Chatywin et al.]

32 minutes ago, RumHam said:

Oof, tough call. They're both shitty movies about animals seeking vengence. I think Jaws 4 is much more watchable. Between Michael Cane and the shark roaring like a lion before exploding for no reason. 

I also always get a kick out of Ellen Brody having flashbacks to an event she wasn't present for.

But then Jaws 4 is also sorta an insult to a great movie.

I mean, we don't know for sure sharks can't roar like lions or explode like their guts are made of dynamite... 

And why can't a woman have flashbacks from events she was never present to? Is it that big of a stretch when she also has a telepathic connection to a shark she's never seen because it ate her kid? 

[Jaxom 1974]

3 hours ago, RumHam said:

Watched the Jaws ripoff Orca for the first time since childhood. I saw the 9% rotten tomatoes score and thought "that seems harsh." But no, it really was that bad. 

Also I should not have seen that movie when I was like ten. 

I watched Jaws 2 after and maybe it was just by comparison but that's not a bad movie. Unessecary sure. I wonder if it would have been a a bit more interesting/better had Dryfuss come back. 

They explain his absence by saying he's on an artic research mission. I'm surprised they haven't tried to turn that mission into a Hooper spinoff. I would watch Jaws vs. The Thing.

Matt Hooper can't have gone to the arctic!  Piranhas got him after Jaws didn't...

Piranha 3D!

Richard Dreyfuss said that he accepted the role after Bob Weinstein persuaded him by offering him a larger salary, which Dreyfuss later donated to charity. Dreyfuss also stated that the ill-fated character he plays is a parody and a near-reincarnation of Matt Hooper, the character he portrayed in the film Jaws (1975), with whom his character shares the same first name.^[2] Jaws was the inspiration for the first movie in the "Piranha" film series, 1978's Piranha.

[RumHam]

Omg that movie. Ok so he just has to survive the super smart alzheimer shark's battle with The Thing so he can live to be the guy from the opening of piranha 3D. 

I'm just spitballing here but maybe he could go underwater. So like the audience thinks he's dead but then at the end he pops up and is fine and he and the other surviving character have a good laugh about it.

[Mr. Chatywin et al.]

Can The Thing swim?

[RumHam]

I never saw Piranha 3DD, but based on its wikipedia article I have to.

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After the events on Lake Victoria, the prehistoric school of bloodthirsty piranhas transforms into a newly opened water park.

Im guessing thats a mistake, but I'd still watch that movie. Maybe like 45 minutes of the townsfolk having fun while wondering where the water park came from. Then the Piranha transform back for the bloody finale.

No but seriously:

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Maddy, a marine biology student, returns home for the summer to the water park she co-owns. She finds that the other owner, her stepfather Chet plans to add an adult-themed section to the waterpark. At a party at the waterpark Maddy encounters her ex-boyfriend Kyle and Barry, Ashley, and Shelby. Shelby and her boyfriend Josh go skinny-dipping in the lake, where a piranha enters her vagina. 

At this point i'm thinking "what a horrible way to die'' but nope.

Quote

 

Maddy consoles Shelby about their friends when they are attacked by a swarm of piranhas.

 

 So now I have to assume this is a checkov's killer fish in a vagina thing. I can't decide if I should finish the article or wait till i'm back home and seek out the movie.

I also had no idea there was a '95 tv movie version.

14 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

Can The Thing swim?

if the host it copies knows how, sure. 

[Deadlines? What Deadlines?]

4 hours ago, RumHam said:

Oof, tough call. They're both shitty movies about animals seeking vengence. I think Jaws 4 is much more watchable. Between Michael Cane and the shark roaring like a lion before exploding for no reason. 

I also always get a kick out of Ellen Brody having flashbacks to an event she wasn't present for.

But then Jaws 4 is also sorta an insult to a great movie.

Orca has a better cast and a trailer that includes the line, "...and like human beings they have a profound instinct for vengeance!"  Take that, fuckers.

Then again, that terrible Jaws sequel built Michael Cain a great house. And, in our hearts, isn't that what we all truly want? For Michael Cain to have a nice house?

I'm torn. 

 

[RumHam]

17 minutes ago, Deadlines? What Deadlines? said:

And, in our hearts, isn't that what we all truly want? For Michael Cain to have a nice house?

 

Its why I got into movie watching to begin with.

Also the whale roars a few times in that trailer! I Don't remember that in the movie but I may have just tuned it out. Anyway jaws 4 may have stolen that.

 In all seriousness I do love the shot of the orca jumping out of the water as the explosion he somehow caused miles inland occurs in the background.

[Deadlines? What Deadlines?]

9 minutes ago, RumHam said:

In all seriousness I do love the shot of the orca jumping out of the water as the explosion he somehow caused miles inland occurs in the background.

Cinematography, Melon Farmer!

Oh, and "Bringer of Death" in Latin is "Mortifer" according to Goolge translate. "Orcinus Orca" apparently roughly translates as "Demon from Hell", which is way more metal.

I guess they chose the former over the latter because it goes better with describing what loving, great parents they are.  

[SuperHans]

12 hours ago, Veltigar said:

That guy really needs more work. I thought he was excellent as Ashur.

Definitely. By some distance the best of the 'slave' actors on that show. I also enjoyed his performance in The Expanse. 

[RumHam]

I meant to comment on how that translation didn't seem right... but it was closer that I thought it would be.

I will say this for the movie, the titular Orca had more personality than any of the Jaws sharks. I guess just cause you see it more and all the eye shots. But also that "Hah! I disrupted your gas supply!" hop.

 

[RhaenysBee]

23 hours ago, Veltigar said:

Watched Rings of Power episode 3 yesterday. I feel very conflicted about this show. On the one hand, it is incredibly stupid (and it tries way too hard to remind me of Starz' Spartacus with all the cross-casting), but on the other hand I do get a lot of enjoyment out of it. 

Given the narrative around the series, I should be glad that I find some joy in it. I don't think most people were expecting that, but I'm surprised that - now that it turned out to be enjoyable - it isn't a surprise golden age of TV type of great show, but rather more like a superior version of MTV's Shannara Chronicles or a more expensive version of the better episodes of BBC's The Adventures of Merlin.

That’s really the point with any entertainment and if you do, so good for you. More of us should think that way. (Not to say that I don’t thoroughly enjoy criticism, I do and it’s absolutely necessary too to a healthy extent). 

I cannot conceive why anyone would cast Crassus as an elf and not a nobleman in Naevia’s court. Mostly because Simon Merrels is nearly 60. Then again, he still looks younger than Michael Gregson. 

[SuperHans]

Finally caught up with The Vast of Night last night. 

Tried to watch this in the cinema, but couldn't understand a word that was being said so bailed after ten minutes.

It's on Prime now, with subtitles, and it's simply fucking amazing.

Probably one of the best independent movies I've ever seen.

[Werthead]

Enjoying Welcome to Wrexham on Disney+ (in most of the world, it's on FX in the US). Basically the documentary version of Ted Lasso, about Rob McElhenney and Ryan Reynolds' inexplicable decision to buy Wrexham Football Club (a struggling team in the fifth tier of the English and Welsh football system). There's a lot of fun from the jarring juxtaposition of flipping back and forth between a small town in Wales and Los Angeles, but it mainly works because the people in Wrexham they pick to follow around are quite interesting people in their own rights, and McElhenney draws on the similarities between blue-collar towns in both the UK and US (comparing places like Wrexham to his native Philadelphia).

If I did have one complaint it's that some of the American comic "bits" (Ryan ribbing McElhenney on his correspondingly lesser degree of fame; Ryan promoting Aviation Gin to an almost psychotic degree) get a bit grating when you want to get back to Wales to see how the new manager is doing. Ryan and McElhenney's Welsh translator who doesn't waste an opportunity to mock them in Welsh is quite amusing though.

Also finished off the final season of Wellington Paranormal (on NowTV in the UK), the original What We Do in the Shadows spin-off (before, er, the What We Do in the Shadows TV series). Quite entertaining, although I can see why they finished it. Without a big budget infusion they'd probably hit the ceiling of what they could do. They do go out with a bang though, with a great time travel story about what would happen to Wellington if all the paranormal craziness they'd stopped over the last four years had proven successful, and Actual Satan showing up (again), when he hasn't even rated an appearance on WWDintS itself yet.

[Argonath Diver]

I definitely want to check it out, as both of those fellas are charismatic guys. I got the feeling watching the trailer that their purchase was as much for the documentary itself as anything. Is that the case in the full episodes? Or was the doc a happy circumstance of their business venture?