Jurassic World- Spoiler Thread

[OnionAhaiReborn]

About the giant whale croc Dino eating the I-Rex at the end... weren't they standing right where crowds of visitors had been standing before? Meaning, that area was not off limits to tourists even though it was in reach of giant whale croc Dino? And that had never been an issue??

[Pliskin]

Yeah, I thought the same thing during the entire film. The whale could have easily jumped on the public.

[john]

Right, so you guys already covered two of the bits that annoyed me in this film. Namely, the bit where the kids decide they want to stay with Pratt, who has done absolutely nothing at this point to their knowledge, other than get saved from a Pterodactyl by their bad ass aunt. And the bit where BDH chastises the dude from New Girl for wearing a Jurassic Park T-shirt but later refuses to evacuate the park for a much worse crisis than ever happened in the original film.

However, the most egregious scene, which kind of ruined the movie for me, was the one that set up the whole bloody film where they decide that the Immodius must have got out because there's some claw marks on the wall and it doesn't show up on the infrared. And they're standing underneath the fucking wall saying "Huh, do you really think it could have climbed out ..." And only then do they bother tracking it's fucking chip. What a bunch of morons. And it's our hero, Owen Whatever, who instigates this immensely stupid move btw. And the movie doesn't even kill him for it.

But yeah, honestly, despite that I think I enjoyed it a lot more than most of you seem to. The dialogue was fine, imo, for the kind of film it was and I thought it manged to differentiate itself enough from the first one to be a good experience on its own merits.

[JonCon's Red Beard]

If you hang a rifle on the wall you better shoot it..that's me butchering a quote I barely remember . When I saw giant whale croc Dino eat the shark I told my friend "bet you that thing eats the I-Rex. Why else put it in the film?

I was still mildly entertained and it was a fun nostalgia fest. Even with all its flaws.

I got spoiled about the Mossa eating the I-Rex, so when someone (can't remember!) said "We need more teeth" I thought they would lead it to the pool.

[JonCon's Red Beard]

The Callbacks

Okay so the visitor center? THE visitor center? That was awesome. I will not apologize for fanboying out over that.

I loved that. There are a lot of homages to the original movie and yeah, I was fangirling as well. "Look! It's mr DNA!", "look! is the banner from movie 1!!". As we went due to father's day (which is tomorrow) the theatre was full with children. I'll try to go and watch it with more adults so we all can fanboy together TwT.

And yes, I yelled "don't burn the banner! It's an historical prop!!".

My fav. nod:

JP: *enters T-Rex* WHEN DINOSAURS RULE THE EARTH.

JW: *Pterodactyl things attack* PTERODONS LIVE: THE IMAX EXPERIENCE.

[Slurktan]

About the giant whale croc Dino eating the I-Rex at the end... weren't they standing right where crowds of visitors had been standing before? Meaning, that area was not off limits to tourists even though it was in reach of giant whale croc Dino? And that had never been an issue??

Presumably the "whale-croc" had been regularly fed Great Whites (and Pteranadon + English ladies) and so was pseudo trained but at night after the park has been closed/evacuated it hasn't eaten for half a day at least and saw something big by the pool and so jumped it cause it was mad starving.

[TrueMetis]

Okay so first thoughts, it was pretty bland and predictable. The character weren't bad, but the script didn't give them a lot to work with. And pretty much all the events happened as I expected, I-rex being still inside, Raptor's betrayal, Raptor's switching back, the stupidity of the cage for the I-rex having a door big enough for it when they said it had been raised in there (which was a plot point since the isolation explains why it was killing for no reason), the idiocy of going into the cage when there's no point, and them not bring in lethal when they went after it just in case. Also the guy with the Anti-tank gun firing it last, dumbass. I admit I didn't expect the T-rex showdown, which was a fitting apology for the idiocy with the Spinosaurus. One bit of incompetency I expected to come into play but didn't was the height of the Raptor cage, easily low enough for them to jump. And one that did was the owner flying the plane to attack the I-rex, wasn't expecting them to be that stupid.

One thing that annoyed me is sure they explained how the I-rex was able to avoid the thermals, even if it was bullshit science but I learned to expect that after the gender change crap in the first one, but how the hell did it know that they were tracking it by thermals? Maybe it does it auto with the Camo. I wasn't terribly bothered about the trained Raptors as I expected to be, and I liked the scene of them shooting the Pterosaur in the helicopter, nice little callback I think. Though now I wish they had mentioned the ones that left the Island after 3, though maybe that was just their way of pretending it didn't exist. On that note they made a similar mistake as 3, bothering with Romance. Totally unnecessary and forced.

And yet, I enjoyed it. The action scenes were good, the effects great and it was a lot of fun. And all the little scene they added that were from the books, like Wu talking about how they aren't real and the other training getting stuck in the log (mimicking a scene in the book where Muldoon is trapped in a pipe) and blowing up a raptor with the LAW were great. They make a sequel and I'll probably see it, hopefully they'll tone don the commentary a bit but at least it was less than what 2 had.

[Roose Seal]

I thought it was completely and utterly dumb - boy did my intelligence felt insulted.

-boy A has a girlfriend, she likes him more than he likes her.. he looks at other girls, he's always bored and sulky. Cool. This is a character we really want to connect to. :rolleyes:

-boy B is super excited about Dinos and is scared that his parents are going to divorce and he cries. This is an obvious and painful manipulation to make us care about this kid... but it's so hamfisted, that we just.. don't care?
Boy A doesn't comfort his brother because he is busy looking at girls? WHO CARES

-mom cries .. a lot. Why is she so emotional? The kids are just going on a holiday? Is it because she knows they're divorcing and nothing will ever be the same? Again, who cares? What does this emotional manipulation add to the story?

-boss lady is super career driven, she doesn't want kids, she doesn't even like kids because career! and oh did we mention she doesn't want kids? What does this add to the story? What does this shaming of a woman who doesn't care for kids add? She is also on the verge of a nervous breakdown the entire movie and cries, a lot (guess it runs in the family) BUT! she can run! from a T-Rex! in heels! Empowerement!

-assistant lady can't take care of the kids properly because she's too busy gossiping on the phone. Ugh, womenfolk and their phones! There's an attempt at characterization but .. who cares? And she gets an unusually cruel and drawn out and honestly super uncomfortable to watch death.. for what reason? Why does the movie punish her so when her only crime was... letting the kids escape her vigilence for a sec?

Not caring about kids is the ultimate crime, in case you didn't get that yet.

-Andy Dwyer clicker trains raptors. Okay let's buy into the premise. But the character is a walking one-liner dispenser and pose for the camera. He is ex-Navy, because all heroes should have military past. Miitary is good! Navy fight terooritss! Navy protect freedom! He has romance with bossy lady, because he is Alpha! Emotional bossy woman actually like dominant Alpha who takes charge! *beats chest*
Chris Pratt is not good, sorry. His act feels horribly forced the entire movie.

-Ah! The Military Guy! Wants to breed mini-I-Rexes to... hunt down terrorists? Because what good is a movie without some amount of pro-military propaganda. I came to see a movie about a dino-park, why am being lectured about the innefficiency of drones against Evil Tunnel-Dwelling Arabs? Freedom raptors!

-we created a new dinosaur!!! it's half-raptor, half..... frog? okay. We can't locate her in her cage because apparently she can thermo-cloak herself, but she has a GPS tracker, no? Why not locate her with that? No, we need a contrived sequence of events to make the big-bad escape. A big bad we created because you, Mr. Mogul wanted more money! Get it? Subtext! Greed is bad! Subtext!
There is no buildup in the action of this film, the pacing/editing is utterly weird. We go from one alarming action scene —Oh no! Big Bad has escaped!— to a kids are amazed! scene and everything is immedietaly cranked up 150%. Big Bad breaks into the aviary, the Helicopters CRASHES there and EXPLODES in the Big Bad's FACE. Are you AMAZED YET at all this AWESOME ACTION?

-When people go on a safari, they stay at a reasonnable distance from the rhinos and the elephants and the buffalos and the hippos... because they're herbivores but that doesn't mean they don't get agressive or defensive? Why are people allowed to canoe next to brontosauruss? roll in hamster balls next to triceratops and ankylosaurus? Gentle-giants my ass!

-People are bored with the park? Attendance is down? Maybe it's because it's on a remote island in Costa-Rica, where not EVERYONE can just fly on a whim? I love "people don't care about dinosaurs anymore", the park's been open for a few years and people are already bored? What kind of message is that? Are people bored of zoos? San Diego zoo decides to hybrid a turtle and a koala bear because eh, kids don't care about either nowadays. ... Attendance is down not because people don't care about dinosaurs, but maybe because no one can afford to even get to your dumb park?

-LOL Johnny Karate comforting the dying brontosaurus! Go Little Foot, remember me when you find the Great Valley.
Also, Boss Lady cries, because dinosaur is DEAD and for the first time she realizes they are human, just like her.

-look! they found the original visitor center! Nostalgia! Are you crying already?

-Look the nighvision goggles! Are you still not crying!

-Aww the mean, apathetic older brother actually cares about his little bro. WHY ARE YOU NOT CRYING ALREADY?

-Kids put their faith in Burt Macklin FBI because ... their aunt saves him?

-Omar Sy is just there? Who cares?

-Wait, the Mososaurus can just jump on the platform where people walk around all day? How much is liability insurance for this park?

-CGI is good! CGI does not make everything look fake as hell! Also, color grading! Orange and blue! everything!

-Career-Driven Boss Lady maybe actually does care about kids in the end. Now that Alpha has kissed her, biological clock is ticking, tick tock tick tock. Because woman need kids with Alpha!

No, sorry, this is not "dumb summer fun", this was a pile of contrived, offensive, sexist and mind-numbingly stupid drivel.
I'm tired of people thinking we should give movies like this a pass because we "shouldn't expect more". Why shouldn't we expect more? Why are our expectations for these type of movies so fucking low? Why do we accept utterly flat and offensive character archetypes, gaping plot-holes, ridiculously over-the-top action sequences.. We don't have to!
The original Jurassic Park is what summer block-busters should be like: it's fun, action packed but it's also smart, tension filled and the characters are people we care about because they are believable. Connecting with the characters means you connect with what's happening to them. And once you buy into the original premise (unrealistic as it may be) the rest of the movie makes sense and doesn't require you to suspend your disbelief scene after scene. This movie requires you to buy into 50 different outlandish premises and ignore dozens of plot contrivances for it to start making any sort of sense.

Whoever wrote this piece of shit of a movie: back to film school!

-Only cool moment was when they make the T-Rex come out of retirement. I loved that.

[denstorebog]

Thank you, Roose Seal, for writing *the* review that convinced me not to go see this movie that we all knew was going to be horseshit from the get-go. This sounds like exactly what I would have written myself if you hadn't taken the silver bullet for me.

[Chilli]

I've seen the movie in 3D. When I saw the blue helicopter flying I thought it was a toy or some miniature or a drone. Also the buildings looked like a maquette when filmed from above. Was the 3D causing that or did they really use a miniature helicopter ad miniature buildings like Mini-Europe.

De dinosaurs were good.

They should have made the kids more likeable, because I didn't really care whether they survived or not.

[Raja]

The laziest way to defend this movie is saying - 'it's a summer movie with a big budget and therefore needs to pander to to the lowest common denominator'. I can't help but compare the film to Godzilla; they both sort of share the same problems, though this movie has a much more charismatic lead than Godzilla did.

The 'plan' that the military dude has is pretty ridiculous. I don't mind absurd plot points if the movie works to compensate with something else in that film, be it characters, visuals or sound but this movie does nothing to win me over. With Godzilla, the visuals were pretty stunning, which meant that I could shut my brain off for the rather ridiculous plot points and character motivations.

I feel for Bryce Dallas Howard, she wasn't given much to work with. There were some good moments though, I liked the bit with the boys in the sphere globe thingy.

[Lord Flashheart]

If anyone is wondering why military guy using raptors as weapons was shoehorned in I imagine you didn't read about the original script some years back. Like a bad idea from an Austin Powers movie Spielberg has a hard on for frickin raptors with frickin laser beams on their heads. I will not be surprised if this is an even bigger plot point if the sequel, since another park seems logically absurd. Not like that would stop them.

[TrueMetis]

Oddly if anything the movie proves the trained Raptor concept can work, it only went wrong when it turned out I-rex had Raptor DNA in it.

[Lord Flashheart]

Oddly if anything the movie proves the trained Raptor concept can work, it only went wrong when it turned out I-rex had Raptor DNA in it.

I actually ended up liking the raptors. Going in expecting to hate them. But the original idea sounded absolutely ludicrous. This was like ten years ago and they had lasers. I think it was put into this movie to take people's temperature on if they could accept the idea of trained raptors.

[Kindly Old Man]

The laziest way to defend this movie is saying - 'it's a summer movie with a big budget and therefore needs to pander to to the lowest common denominator'. I can't help but compare the film to Godzilla; they both sort of share the same problems, though this movie has a much more charismatic lead than Godzilla did.

.

This is a good article about why the 'just turn your brain off' argument is so bad.

[Raja]

Jurassic World has been worth it just for this comment.

[Jace, Extat]

Jurassic World clocks in at $102 million domestically this weekend.

YIKES! I guess the rumors of the death of the box office were somewhat unfounded.

[Spring Bass]

The Power of Nostalgia. Which makes it all the more disappointing that this was such a 7/10 level movie - any action-packed movie with the "Jurassic Park" label (or the "Star Wars" label, etc) was going to make $1 billion just off the nostalgia-fueled audience who will show up in droves because of name recognition after more than 10 years without a Jurassic Park movie. Why not try to be more creative with it?

One of the defenses I've heard for the "Raptor Whisperer" and "military subplot" ideas is that the former is similar to what zoos do with real-life animals, and the latter is supposed to be stupid in-universe as well (as shown by the fact that the Raptors turn on all their handlers except Pratt). I still think the latter is stupid.

[Humble AK]

This movie was really stupid. That people could enjoy it by getting what they expected from a dumb summer movie blows my mind. Why not expect a good summer movie, you know, like Jurassic Park? Why deliberately cripple your standards?

I defy anyone to say the ending was good. The raptors and T-Rex teaming up as dino buddies to take down the evil Indomitus, saving the humans because humans are awesome. And that look of respect the T-Rex exchanged with the raptor and the raptor exchanged with Star Lord.

I will never understand some people here. They give scathing non-stop criticism of Game of Thrones, but then watch something with the intelligence of the Dorne plot, and even then minus a thousand, and go, hey, I got what I paid for so I liked it.

[DaveSumm]

I defy anyone to say the ending was good. The raptors and T-Rex teaming up as dino buddies to take down the evil Indomitus, saving the humans because humans are awesome. And that look of respect the T-Rex exchanged with the raptor and the raptor exchanged with Star Lord.

As soon as they started looking at each other I was like "Oh God PLEASE don't nod-don't-nod-don't-nod-don't-nod........OK they didn't nod. But that was still pretty lame".