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General parenting advice thread


BigFatCoward
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1 hour ago, 3CityApache said:

Needless to say every attempt to try and talk to her about it results in accusations of being an oppresive parent and so on. Welcome to adolescence.

Sounds joyful.

As mentioned in my post above my girls are younger and still experimenting, but alcoholism runs in the maternal family so I'd be lying if I said there weren't background concerns.  

Your daughter shuts down conversation completely?

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8 minutes ago, JGP said:

Your daughter shuts down conversation completely?

Let's just say such a conversation never ends well, unless this is what you consider shutting the door to her room in front of your face.

Having said that, I still hope I'm overreacting here a bit, she hasn't passed out as far as I know, always comes back roughly when promised and still manages not to fuck the school up completely. 

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2 minutes ago, 3CityApache said:

Let's just say such a conversation never ends well, unless this is what you consider shutting the door to her room in front of your face.

Having said that, I still hope I'm overreacting here a bit, she hasn't passed out as far as I know, always comes back roughly when promised and still manages not to fuck the school up completely. 

Yeah, that'd be hard for me. 

Being a parent and encouraging healthy autonomy can be a tough row to hoe sometimes :)

 

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1 hour ago, polishgenius said:

Aussies and English giving a Pole drinking advice.

Cute. 

i have long semi seriously advocated for drink drive rules for polish people to be different, some of the readings i've seen from someone who appears stone cold sober, would have a normal person sobbing on the floor in their own shit. 

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I had a harder time with the not-sleeping kiddos than the experimenting-with-alcohol teens, but my two were quite reasonable about the latter and only got vomiting drunk once or twice, and that was when they were at their mother's, so not my cleanup :p

On the other hand, just wait till they're adults and start dating unsuitable partners. That's fun.

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2 minutes ago, BigFatCoward said:

i have long semi seriously advocated for drink drive rules for polish people to be different, some of the readings i've seen from someone who appears stone cold sober, would have a normal person sobbing on the floor in their own shit. 

 

I've been to Polish weddings and I've been to English weddings and the difference between both how much drinking is done and how the guests handle that drinking is genuinely hilarious. 

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4 hours ago, BigFatCoward said:

used to come home wasted every weekend night from 13

Woo -- how ... differently were the lives and community standards for us and where we grew up -- meaning for my age cohort.  I never even had a drink until after leaving home for college*.  And I was far from the only one, at least among the girls.  Guys among the cohorts generally thought of as not well brought up (the bad kids), it was different for some of them.  But every weekend?  Nobody!

Maybe it was the weather that made the difference? 6 - 7 month winters with weeks of below zero and tons of snow?

* I made up for it then, probably.  But the weather was so much better in New Mexico . . . .

Edited by Zorral
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3 hours ago, JGP said:

 

Being a parent and encouraging healthy autonomy can be a tough row to hoe sometimes :)

 

addendum: Just got a text from Tyrion that she needs money for her Halloween costume [no school today] and that her and all her friends are going as the Magic Mike guys, and... I need a personal pocket dimension where I can go and just scream lol 

Edited by JGP
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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 months later...

I have put my foot down and said my wife has to share the nighttime load. We've moved a mattress into his room and take turns sleeping on the floor next to him to settle him. She looks like a smackhead,.

I thought it would make her appreciate me more for what I've been doing by myself for the last few years, boy did I misjudge that one. 

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Wife made mistake of letting 5 year old know:

a: there are games on her phone

b: her phone’s pin

So now my wife (or rether her phone) is daughter’s preferred choice to sit with her aftrr bath before bed.

She also told my wife to ‘calm yourself’.

Previously, on my wife asking for phone back, it was, ‘be patient. You need to share.’

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17 minutes ago, Derfel Cadarn said:

Wife made mistake of letting 5 year old know:

a: there are games on her phone

b: her phone’s pin

So now my wife (or rether her phone) is daughter’s preferred choice to sit with her aftrr bath before bed.

She also told my wife to ‘calm yourself’.

Previously, on my wife asking for phone back, it was, ‘be patient. You need to share.’

She’s 5? I bet you guys are really looking forward to 15… or 11! 

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5 hours ago, Derfel Cadarn said:

Wife made mistake of letting 5 year old know:

a: there are games on her phone

b: her phone’s pin

So now my wife (or rether her phone) is daughter’s preferred choice to sit with her aftrr bath before bed.

She also told my wife to ‘calm yourself’.

Previously, on my wife asking for phone back, it was, ‘be patient. You need to share.’

I truly love this. From afar, I'd find her insufferable if I had to look after her myself.

That said, I was also this brand of obnoxious child when I was younger. Have you raised her in the vicinity of 70s/80s/90s TV and film with an emphasis of Britcoms with lots of innuendo by any chance?

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44 minutes ago, HexMachina said:

I truly love this. From afar, I'd find her insufferable if I had to look after her myself.

That said, I was also this brand of obnoxious child when I was younger. Have you raised her in the vicinity of 70s/80s/90s TV and film with an emphasis of Britcoms with lots of innuendo by any chance?

Her programs of choice at the moment are Bluey, Peppa Pig, Coco melon, and Blipppi.

God help us when she’s a teenager

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I dunno if it's still the case or if there's been some change in the writing in the last few years, but about 6-10 years back nearly every English-speaking parent I knew who had let their kids watch Peppa banned them from doing so, because imitating the way she talks made them so rude. 

 

Weirdly that problem didn't translate over to German so much. The whole 'German is more direct' thing I guess. 

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I think there is a specific strain of ‘anerican wise ass’ kid in a lot of US kids shows that can be insufferable, and that is the point of them. The joke being that they are basically a 40 year old trapped in a 12 year old’s body.

Luckily my kids don’t watch that stuff, they are more into Bluey, Peppa etc whose main characters are at most, a little cheeky, but still pleasant. 
 

Having said that, they have come from school having picked up some phrases that make me shake my head, but that is all part of growing up I guess. 

Edited by Heartofice
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